


Not a Metaphor of What We Really Could Be

by AngelWithAStory



Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Critical Role: Wildemount Campaign (Web Series)
Genre: Drabble, F/F, Feelings, Implied Sexual Content, Lazy Mornings, it's literally just yasha and beau cuddling in bed, lots of fluff for the soul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-26 03:17:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14393148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelWithAStory/pseuds/AngelWithAStory
Summary: Lazy mornings were few and far between in any respectable line of work. Even in an unrespectable one, lazy mornings were to be cherished.





	Not a Metaphor of What We Really Could Be

**Author's Note:**

> this is dedicated to the-sleepy-dm from discord who encouraged this gay mess
> 
> title from What I Need by Hayley Kiyoko because it's appropriate and gay
> 
> its almost 4am and I'm real tired, so I'll try and fix any mistakes in the morning <3

Lazy mornings were few and far between in any respectable line of work. Even in an unrespectable one, lazy mornings were to be cherished.

Or that was Yasha’s worldview.

So any morning when weak sunlight spilling through a inn room’s window and Yasha could wake up when _she_ wanted to was a damn good morning, in her opinion. And that morning, she let herself sleep for as long as her bladder would let her. Which wasn’t long enough, honestly.

Yasha’s eyes opened slowly. The buzz of alcohol had long-since faded from her system and the familiar ache of a hangover was fully in place. Yasha took a brief moment to consider it as she let the rest of her wake up.

It certainly wasn’t the worst hangover she’d ever had, and it didn’t seem as bad as it should have been considering how much they’d drunk the night before. Molly had probably gotten his way and made them drink water before going to bed. Wouldn’t be the first time.

What _was_ new, was the arm wrapped around her waist.

It didn’t help that the weight attached to it was comfortable in a way that made something deep inside Yasha’s gut twist uncomfortably. How long had it been since Yasha had woken up next to someone? Months? A year? _More_ than one?

The arm curled slightly and pulled Yasha closer. A happy sigh ghosted over Yasha’s bear back ( _oh Gods, when had she taken her clothes off?)_ and Yasha had never felt a greater conflict rage inside her.

On one hand, she had swore off moments like this: waking up beside someone, being vulnerable in someone’s arms, _wanting_ this. This went against everything Yasha had built for herself. This was everything she _didn’t_ need. She’d opened her heart before and it had only caused her pain and anger.

On the other….

Yasha carefully twisted her head around to look at the body behind her.

Beau was still asleep, and there was something wondrous about that. When she was awake, Beau was all _energy_. Sometimes she was laughing with Fjord or playing along with one of Jester’s little schemes or bickering with Molly. Sometimes she was fighting, and that in itself was something to behold.

When Beau was fighting she was more than just energy. The way she moved would almost be distracting if Yasha let it be. Sometimes fluid movements, sometimes graceful leaps in the air, sometimes sharp jabs and liquid circles as she sliced the staff through the air.

 _Energy_.

But when she was asleep, there was a calmness over her. It looked so foreign on her face that Yasha almost wanted to wake her up. Almost wanted to gently tuck those loose strands of hair away from her face and tuck them behind her ear and whisper Beau awake.

Yasha hated those thoughts.

She hated them because she _wanted_ them but she knew that she couldn’t handle them.

Yasha could only handle so many heartbreaks in her life, and she was already rapidly approaching her limit.

For all her bravado and stony expressions and imposing form, Yasha couldn’t handle it; she would break.

Slowly, carefully, stealthily, Yasha began to inch towards the edge of the bed. With every shift of subtle noise Beau made, Yasha stopped. She waited. When the coast was clear, _only_ then would Yasha move again.

The end was in sight, and Yasha could just about slip her legs out from under the covers. Maybe she could just slip out of the room and they would never bring this up again. Beau would never try and mention this _encounter_ if Molly was around, so all Yasha had to do was never leave Molly’s side. Of course, he would tease her about this, but she knew he was trustworthy in this.

Yasha’s foot silently flattened on the floor beside the bed and she was already ready to sit up. She was almost there!

“ _Nope._ ”

Beau’s sleep-addled voice was quickly followed by Yasha being dragged backwards into Beau’s warm embrace.

Yasha sighed as she settled into the thin mattress. _So close._ Carefully, Yasha turned so she was facing Beau - who was very much awake and now had a slight shit-eating grin on her face.  

“How long have you been awake?” Yasha asked. She noted how Beau’s eyes widened _very_ slightly at Yasha’s sleep-roughened voice.

“Long enough for you to go through your crisis.” Beau said, showing _yet again_ why Yasha could never let herself have this. The idea of being so thoroughly understood by someone was terrifying.

( _Molly was the only exception to that rule, but it had still been a while before Yasha let Molly into her trauma._ )

“If this was a mistake, Yash, then I get it.” Beau said, bringing Yasha back out of her thoughts. “If you tell me to fuck off, then I’ll fuck off back to Jester and Nott’s room and I won’t say anything about this again. But, I could stand to do last night again. It was a lot of fun.”

Beau’s smile seemed more sincere now, and Yasha hated it. Hated how _understanding_ Beau was. Why couldn’t be as much of a terrible person as she pretended to be?

Last night _was_ fun, and Yasha could feel that burn in her veins when she thought about doing it again. That sweet fire in her blood that felt like the best high she could reach.

She wanted to do it again.

Recklessly, Yasha reached out. And she touched Beau’s cheek.

Nothing more. Nothing less.

Beau waited. She waited for Yasha to decide, to come to a conclusion, hoping it was the one she wanted.

And when Yasha made that decision, she knew she might live to regret it.

She still leaned in a kissed Beau.

It wasn’t a _fantastic_ kiss: they both still had the smell of last night around them, their mouths tasted faintly of liquor, and the angle could have used some work.

But Yasha still melted when Beau’s arms wrapped around her and held her tight and sighed and melted into the kiss like it was some divine blessing. It was endearing and arousing how easily Beau gave herself over to Yasha, and Yasha suddenly _loved_ it.

She never wanted the moment to end.

“Sooooo, is that a yeah?” Beau asked, her cheeks just a little flushed and her lungs just a _little_ out of breath.

“Yes.” Yasha promised, surrendering her heart with one simple word.

“Cool.” Beau said, leaning in and kissing Yasha with a renewed passion.

After all, that was what lazy mornings were for.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm queenmoggy on tumblr and discord if you are also super gay for beau and/or yasha


End file.
